Tuesday 9 February 2010

Body clock - a myth or truth?

I have often heard people talk about ‘body clock’ wherein they mean that come what may, their body automatically becomes aware of the time and acts accordingly. Such persons do not need an alarm clock to wake them up every morning before going to work. It is also true that such people cannot sleep for a longer time even if they want to. I was simply wondering why it doesn’t become applicable to me. If I do not have my mobile phone next to me, I am sure to sleep for a longer time missing the alarms. On weekends, my morning begins when it is noon for the others.

I began contemplating on this for some time. Why is it that even if I get up at 5.15 every morning (except weekends) my body still needs an alarm to wake up? Why my body has a different time frame? I have discussed this with many people. Nobody gave me a clear answer. But I noticed one thing. When I have an ardent necessity to wake up the next morning to accomplish an important task, knowingly or unknowingly, I feed my mind with that thought until I shut my eyes. On such times, I become conscious very soon. It so happened that one morning, I dozed off because of a bad back without keeping any alarm to wake up. My sub-conscious mind began working and would have reminded my body about the pending work to be done at home before kids come back from school and that I should be awake at least an hour before they come. And guess what? I even dreamt about my kids waiting at the door while I am still asleep with no job done at home. I got up with a great shock within few minutes of my sleep and checked the time. There was plenty of time left for me. But that was a reminder fed in my sub conscious mind which worked! Though I do not have the guts to fully rely on my sub-conscious mind, I wish to try it out someday. This reminder of my mind works only when I have an urgent and inevitable job to be done. Otherwise, it also sleeps along with me  Why is it that only for me such feeding of data should be done as I sleep whereas for others, no such feeding becomes necessary? I have seen many sleeping without any alarms in their hand. I am really envious of such people. I wish I could change the battery of my body clock so that it begins to function like others’.

My brother-in-law once told me that body clock does exist in everybody’s body. He said that it has something to do with our mind. He told me that just before sleeping, I should imagine a clock (either analog or digital) indicating the time I wish to get up and then sleep and I am sure to get up the next morning at the same time. As I told previously, I never had the guts to risk leaving my mobile behind and once my mobile is with me, I cannot try any other methods. My sleep becomes blissful transferring all responsibility on my mobile phone. Thanks mobile phones for this most wonderful feature!

Monday 8 February 2010

Hunger lesson

To shed down a few calories that I had accumulated from my last vacation to India few weeks back, seems to be a Herculean task. When all others at home enjoy a sumptuous meal, I did not want to treat my stomach callously. So I keep feeding myself with minimum low calorie stuff. I get up everyday to just fight with my weakness - sweets! When will I stop fancying these sugary substances? I wish the small patch inside the mouth remains dry until I exhaust my work out schedule if not forever.

At this juncture, I suddenly was reminded about the millions of hungry people around the world dieing out of starvation every day. Is eating a little lesser than normal that painful when compared to those who are desperate for food? Is controlling my appetite an extremely difficult task when millions of little children survive with one incomplete or no meal per day? I was also reminded of the situation in Haiti. When people turn extremely hungry, there are no differences of any kind among them. They are just ‘hungry’ people. No man’s hunger is superior or inferior when compared to others’. When the need for food is predominantly present, their mind can never regulate them to discipline and righteousness. They just fall a prey to the place where food is. It takes determination to willfully go without food and yet remain with all the senses intact. Only great people can do that.

One such person is my guitar master. A Christian by birth, he willfully sacrificed his meal schedules for the sake of his fellow Muslim colleagues during the holy month of Ramadan. When I came to know of it initially, I was really shocked. I have been in the Gulf for nearly 10 years now and not once have I tried fasting along with the population during that time but this gentleman has been doing it for the past 5 years without any coercion. When I asked him the reason and intention behind it, he just humbly said that when his brothers are not in a position to have food, he would as well do the same and be a part of them. It should be noticed here that there have been no changes in his work timings during that period just because he was fasting. Only Muslims are given some relaxation in their work timings. But still he appeared as fresh as ever all through the period and I became aware of his deeds just few days before Eid.

When we are left with no other choice, then it is a different story but when we have the opportunity but still voluntarily refrain from doing something, is not an act done by all. Here I learnt that joy or distress of others can only be understood when we consciously and willfully step into their shoes. Once we do so, we will never be able to forget the pain or joy that we experienced out of it. That in turn will help us view, understand and love all equally.

Sunday 7 February 2010

Shadows of the Dark

I am being followed and I am sensitive to it. It is irritating but inevitable. Neither can I hide nor can I escape. From the moment I wake up it stays with me with its ugly amorphous form. It is worse than a shadow since it follows me even at night. It makes me more conscious though others cannot see it. It is a nasty feeling to see it always beside me.

I sat down and contemplated to find out how and when it began; more so when did I evidently began realizing its presence. I understood that it all started the moment I lost my innocence, the moment I gave a fake smile, the moment I spoke untruth, the moment I fell as a victim to flattery, the moment I lost trust in others, the moment I formed opinions…….The list is endless. I realized it following me very recently when I finished my assignment of reviewing myself.

What could be the connection? There is a subtle link as scriptures always quoted. The nebulous substance that followed me is nothing but the results of my own actions. What can I do to get rid of this stuff? There is not much I can do about it. In the equation of life, two minus signs does not become a plus. Hats off to Him for His constant vigil over every act of the universe! The most interesting part here is that, though I am just a speck in this massive cosmos, I am also being watched. Shouldn’t I call myself blessed? And the good news is that we all are!

When I can notice the shadows of my past cruising around me, why can’t I notice the splendour of His creation encircling me? It is now time to act genuine by throwing away the cases of artificiality and stepping into the realms of integrity. What cannot be fixed can only be thrown. So let me begin my journey to gaze at the brilliance of the movement of every atom of the universe instead of concentrating on silly pleasures. Let me watch every step of mine before He does so that the shadows of my dark don’t get too heavy.

Saturday 6 February 2010

Soul connections?

It was the first time I ever met her. She was just learning to walk with the help of her Mother on the pavement. She took little steps with her tiny feet that often lost balance and resulted in a big fall. Her diapers made her fall appear less dangerous. I adored her innocence and purity. Her very appearance brought an instant smile on my face. I just felt like lifting her and planting a sweet kiss on her cheeks. It was hard to ignore her as I passed her on the road. So I just waved at her and walked. But she found something else interesting in me. She took fast steps to match my speed and fell down as a result. Thanks to her Mother who made her feel better after the fall. But she did not stop. She continued marching towards me. I thought that it might be the key chain in my hand that attracted her because I had nothing else in my hand. But no! It was not that. She lifted her hands instructing me to lift her. I did it immediately as I always wanted to do that to her. She settled comfortably in me laying her little head on my shoulders. She then closed her eyes and began singing a soft song in her language with her mouth unopened. I simply did not understand what was going on. She then opened her eyes and looked at me and played with the lace of my dress. She smiled at me again and again. She brought in some joy unknowingly. I felt divine as I held her in my arms. Her Mother made several attempts to take her away from me but she just wouldn’t listen. She stayed with me as though she always belonged to me. She gave me the same feeling too as long as she was with me. How I wished to carry the little girl to my house and exchanging words of silent songs! But reality is harsh. Her Mother had to take some hard steps to take her away from me. Both of us felt the pain. The little girl reacted to the pain of separation by a loud cry and I couldn’t.